"I wanted to force myself to be uncomfortable, to be noticeable, to be loud"

XOGORDA

Multidisciplinary Artist

Puerto Rico

Who are you?

Honestly I hate this question and love this question. Depends on the particular day and mood

really, but the way I see it, I am everything and I am nothing; a human who creates things.

My name is Queli (spanish for Kelly) and I make art that makes me feel.


What kind of art do you make?

I try not to limit myself so I experiment in a lot of different mediums. I paint and get to channel a

lot of my creative energy through there, but I needed another way to create, to work through

some stuff that was building up.


Maybe before you ask me what I create, you should ask me why I create.

I create because I have to, because it’s my way of understanding and relating to the world

around me. I create because it helps me work through all the bullshit. I create because it’s my

way of speaking to the world. I create because art is my constant and like breathing.


I KNOW I am not the only one in this universe who struggles with loving exactly who she is.

Pero, I learned this new word: MULTIDISCIPLINARY ARTIST. Beautiful right? It means more

than one discipline. I started out painting (still very much painting and exploring) and currently

working on becoming a full time artist, but I don’t want to limit my process. I want to give myself

the freedom to explore, working through different mediums.


This is where performance art came into my life. It started out as mostly just a personal

experiment. I wanted to force myself to be uncomfortable, to be noticeable, to be loud. To stop

making myself disappear. So I turned on the camera one night in my room and started recording

myself. Let’s just say things got really weird. I had no trust in my body to do anything and I

wasn’t sure who was more unforgiving, me or the camera.


But I kept coming back. It was like therapy and when I was done it felt SO GOOD, cathartic

even! I couldn’t explain it. I was finally giving myself the space to be weird, to just be and do

whatever. It was through this that I started finally seeing myself differently and really allowing

myself to be, to exist as I am.


Part of the experiment was to share the experience, so I created @xogordaxqueli to document

the experience and archive these videos.


What is XOGORDA?

XOGORDA means hugs and kisses fat girl. So it’s like a signature but also it’s a

message/reminder to love. I KNOW I am not the only one in this universe who struggles with

loving exactly who she is.


XOGORDA is a space to create, to grow, and to love. I give you permission to come in and sit

down with me for a while, to observe in silence, maybe make yourself uncomfortable and learn